A Day In The Life

Today I took a little jaunt to my favorite store, Forever 21, and found myself enclined to share with you, "A Shopping Tale: Things I learned in the fitting room and behind closed curtains".
The first thing I learned behind closed curtains today was about myself:
Dear Love Handles,
Why do you find it necessary to sequester yourself upon my bum and give me unappreciated cleavage. When I wear my pajama pants I feel confident, but the moment I put on the blue jeans you're up and at it again. I try and tuck you into my pants, but you're persistance has proved itself time and time again. I'm willing to negotiate occupancy if you're willing to spread out the troops and send them up north to mount on my 'hilly' region. Deal?

Chillen' in my pj's,
J

The next thing I learned today was about the concept of objectivity V subjectivity.
Refer to Object A:


Trying on an item similar to this with a fitted pair of jeans(love handles and all), I thought the shirt looked rather cute, although it didn't quite make the cut, and here's why. Stepping out with my next top on to get approval from the Sis, I looked over to see the same shirt on a girl, however child didn't have any pants on! At first it seemed rather slutty, but then I thought perhaps I've gotten it wrong this whole time. That cute little pink and orange flowly number at home...is that really a shirt, or am I making it into a 'shirt' because I have an ongoing contract with my jeans? Have I been gasp!, committing a fashion faux pas this whole time??
Getting down to the Bottom of This,
J

The last and final thing I learned today was about Forever 21 in general.
I love this store, I really really do, but sometimes, rrr SOMETIMES it just really does me wrong in instances like these: I found a really pretty white- knitted around the neckline-flowy tunic. I know for a fact that it isn't a dress, (although that girl in the fitting room might try to pull it off) but the way it looks on me now is somewhat questionable since I bought it a size bigger. You see, Forever's computer system said there was a small available in the store, so I spent the day rummaging through racks, desperately trying to locate a shirt among the piles and piles of clothes knowing full well, that in a store like this, the probability of my finding would be slim to none. Needless to say, I am now the partially proud owner of a shirt that's size makes me look like I'm with child.
To the size small shirt hiding somewhere in Forever 21-you sneaky little bitch,
J